You are my moon and you are my stars
by jackie.bedford1997
Summary: Remus dissapears, but when Sirius finds him it turns into a squabble between the two boys, but could this be the start of a new found love.
1. Chapter 1

Wolfstar

You are my moon and you are my stars.

Chapter one: It had been a hard week for Remus this week, recently he thought that during an episode he had hurt one of his friends (Sirius) so he shut himself off from everyone, wouldn't speak to a sole. He missed all of his classes, but the professors knew about his condition and the current situation so they let him take as much time away as he felt was needed, for him to recover fully. It had been almost a month and Sirius was missing him somewhat dearly, Remus had never hurt him, but Sirius hasn't been able to find him to talk to him, so Sirius has gone looking for him.

Sirius finds Remus in a self-made log hut somewhere in the high trees of the dark forest, Sirius noticing the moon, but being to over excited about finding Remus forgot that Remus turns to a werewolf at moonlight…

"Remus!" shouted Sirius

"Please don't come near me" groaned Remus

With Sirius' eyes welling up "but I miss you moony"

"Go, leave me alone, you can't stay here" Remus' tone was sharp, hiding that fact he missed Sirius dearly

Moments later the moonlight shone through onto Remus, he started to change into his werewolf form, "Im not leaving you like this Remus! Im not going anywhere", but before he had the chance to look at Remus properly he was already in full form. Remus was snarling and he began slowly creeping up towards Sirius. He knew he wouldn't stand a chance like this against him so he changed into his animagus form, a large black dog known as padfoot. The two males squabbled until near death when Remus managed to pull away and gain control of himself. Remus had taken hiding behind a large tree, but as he looked round his heart sank as he saw padfoot lying lifelessly on the ground, he ran over to him and laid the big dog in his arms "Sirius… can you hear me" sobbed Remus, Sirius was back human, but he still laid lifelessly in his arms, Remus cradled him holding him close to his chest, "Im so sorry, I really am" cried Remus, he knew he couldn't leave him here so he picked him up and carried him off to a place where Sirius stays.

It wasn't much, a small little brick shed like room, but it was heated and had two places to sleep in case Remus ever needed someone to stay with him. Remus laid Sirius on one of the beds and wrapped him in a blanket while he ran a hot tub of water to bathe him and Sirius in. He places the tub in front of the fire a gabbed Sirius who was still just as lifeless as he was in the forest, "I love you, please don't leave me" Remus wept over Sirius' body, but little to his knowledge Sirius was listening, "I'm not going anywhere moony". Sirius was badly injured so Remus sat him in the tub of water and washed his wounds, Sirius insisted and told him they would be fine, but Remus wanted to take care of him, he gently squeezed water over Sirius' body and gently drying them making sure they was clean so they didn't become infected. Later that night after they had both been cleaned up they sat in front of the fire with a blanket, Sirius laid his head on Remus and whispered "I heard what you said earlier" but Remus didn't reply "I heard you say you loved me" Remus froze, but then turned away, "I love you too" Sirius said with a gulp, he turned to Remus and cupped his face in his hands "I don't know if you know it, but I've loved you for quite some time now and when you disappeared it broke my heart… I thought I'd never see you again and… and I…" Sirius began to cry and the more he tried to speak the more he cried, Remus was never the best at comforting people when they were crying but he moved up towards Sirius and wiped away his tears "I've loved you for quite a while too and when I thought I had hurt you I couldn't live with myself so I went, but then you found me and then I really did hurt you". The two boys hugged, but as they slowly parted from one another Sirius grabbed the back of Remus' head and pulled him in, he gently pressed his lips against his and he softly kissed him, but Remus didn't kiss him back and instead he pulled away slightly shocked and lost for words "sorry" Sirius said quietly, but seconds later Remus pushed Sirius to the flood and climbed on top of him, their lips smashed together and Sirius let out a soft moan, their tongues explored each other's mouths and it became heated rather quickly "hey moony I think it would be comfier on the bed" Sirius got up and pulled Remus towards him slowly unbuttoning his shirt, Remus slipped off his trousers and helped Sirius get his off too, their lips crashed together once again, Remus had Sirius between his legs as they grinded together letting out small moans. Hours had gone by and they had fell asleep in one another's arms.

Morning came and they both awoke still wrapped in each other's arms, "morning moony, we should probably get back to James and lily, they might think I got kidnapped or something" Sirius chuckled. Later that day they went back and found lily and James "Merlin's beard! Remus is back" shouted James as he jumped onto Remus, " what happened to you two, you both looked like you've been dragged through hell and back" said lily in a concerned manor " Remus and I got in a bit of a squabble while he was transitioning, I found him while the moon was appearing a totally forgot, I turned into my animagus cause I knew I wouldn't stand a chance against him like this, but we stayed somewhere and recovered and now we are back" Sirius explained, "We are glad that you're both back and safe, we was actually in the middle of truth and dare, want to join?" lily asked "sure" Remus and Sirius replied", as they played they got onto the topic of relationships and stuff "Remus, have you ever done anything?" asked James Remus put his head down and shook his head, Sirius knew about them two and he knew he wouldn't say anything about that, but he never knew he was his first. The questions kept on going and it got a little too much for Remus so he left and headed to bed out of the way. While lily and James went down for dinner Sirius went to check up on Remus who was lying in his bed topless, Sirius could see his scars and he could see he had been crying, " you okay moony" "go away Sirius" Sirius walked up to Remus and sat on his bed "I said go away" Remus said sounding annoyed that he didn't leave the first time "Im not going anywhere until you tell me what's wrong" Sirius claimed, "I didn't like the subject of the questions and I didn't feel like I fitted in" "I thought you had girlfriend's moony" "no… I only said I did so that you and the others wouldn't think I was weird or something" Oh moony Ii would never think that you was weird, I love you for who you are" Remus sat up and laid on Sirius and he gently whispered "this bed isn't big enough for the both of us" they went to the couch which was slightly bigger for them both to get on "what if James and lily see us Sirius?" they won't, they've gone for food so they should be awhile and besides if we stay away we can just quickly move" Sirius took off his shirt and laid on Remus' bare chest, he traced his fingers around his body and then he kissed him once again "I love you padfoot" "I love you too moony" and with that they had both fallen asleep. An hour or so later lily and James came back with goodies for them all to share, but as she was about to sit down she saw the two boys cuddled up to one another, "hey James, have you seen these two love bugs" James looked shocked, but he probably thought they was doing it for a laugh so he ignored it and thought nothing more of it. Remus was awake playing with Sirius' hair as he peacefully slept on him, but he suddenly stopped as he heard someone get up, he thought maybe they saw them and began to panic he quickly put on some clothes and acted like it never happened.

The next week they had broken up for Christmas, but Remus, James, Sirius and lily all thought it would be fun to stay and spend their Christmas together and stay at school, Lily and James had left that afternoon to spend time together walking and playing in the snow, while Remus and Sirius stayed in the warmth and spent a lot of time together, Remus would read, Sirius would play his guitar and sing soft love songs. Sirius was bored and decided he wanted to do something, but Remus was having none of it, Sirius who laid next to Remus was playfully pulling at him until he finally gave into Sirius, he took off his shirt and pinned Sirius to the ground "easy tiger" smirked Sirius "shut up" "make me" Sirius giggled, but out of nowhere Remus was on top of him kissing his neck, Sirius rolled him over so it was him who was at the top, he reached down Remus' pant and touched him, he smirked at Remus, but little did they know lily and James where on their way back up, Sirius pulled off his top and wrapped himself around Remus "I wish we didn't have to hide it" said Sirius, Remus tickled down Sirius' side and them tumbled over and over again playfully like two pups, but at the door stood James and lily, "do you think they will ever find out about us Sirius?" "Im not too sure, but we did fall asleep last night they might of seen us…", James and lily tried to creep in so they didn't hear them but the flooring creaked as they walked, Sirius and Remus jumped to their feet trying to cover themselves "this is not what it looks like" shouted Remus, but Sirius wasn't bothered and he just smirked at the two of them. When Sirius was alone James came to him and asked about the two of them "so where did this all come from" "well after the squabble he took me back to this little place and he cradled me in his arms and he said he loved me and he didn't want me to go, but he didn't know I was waking up so I said I'm not going anywhere moony, he then bathed my wounds and then after that we kind of cuddled and I said I knew what he said, but he didn't answer so then I said I love you too… "And do you love him?" asked James, Sirius paused "yes… I love him a lot and I was lost without him" Sirius began to cry and then Remus walked in James moved away so Remus could comfort Sirius, he pulled Sirius into his chest and held him close "Im not going anywhere now" Remus laid back and Sirius curled beside him, it was almost as if they had always been together.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: It had been over a year now and Remus and Sirius weren't as close as they once was, Remus missed him as he felt as he filled all the empty parts of him, but he just didn't have the guts to talk to him about it, although they did still hang around together and they did speak, but nothing felt the same as it once did and it didn't feel right anymore. Remus was starting to regret even saying that he loved him and holding him that night of the attack, he thought that maybe if he didn't do that then it wouldn't be like this now and neither of them would have to feel the way they both did.

It was the time of the year again where everyone was going home for the Christmas holidays, Sirius hated going home, he wasn't ready for the mental abuse off of his family, he just wanted to be with his friends, but he wanted to be with Remus more. He wondered if he had done something wrong to cause the two to drift apart, the thought of his and Remus never being that close again tore him up inside, he never thought that they would of got that close, Sirius had loved Remus for longer than he told Remus, he loved how he was as a person, tall and awkward, the one who would rather bury his face into a good book than be in the middle of a party, Sirius was the complete opposite of that, but maybe that's what brings them closer is the fact there the missing parts of one another. Sirius had been home several days and already he had had enough of being home so early hours one morning he gathered some of his stuff and left. He was walking down the streets with tears streaming down his face which is unusual for him because he doesn't like people to see him cry as he thinks they will think that he's weak, he was on the search for one of his friends' houses, somewhere for him to stay, he wasn't quite sure where Remus lived but he found a small place that looked quite familiar to him, but he wasn't quite sure. He turned into his animagus form and crept into the house. He went upstairs and entered the first room he came to, he went up to the bed and sniffed the hand that was hanging out of the bed, it was Remus! Padfoot's tail wagged with excitement to have found him, he nudged his hand, but he didn't wake up so he jumped onto the and licked the side of his face, Remus rolled over, but he still didn't wake up, Sirius knows that Remus is a hard one to wake up he always has been, but padfoot was starting to get impatient so he gently pawed the side of his face. "Padfoot!" Remus sat up with excitement, Sirius had changed back into his human for, "What an earth are you doing here" Remus asked shocked to see his best friend "I had to come see you moony I couldn't stand being there no longer" by now Sirius was crying again, Remus had never seen his friend so emotional as he always acts like nothing phases him "but why did you come here" Remus asked "I've missed you moony, we don't feel as close anymore, have I done something wrong, I..I love you…please don't leave me", Remus didn't say nothing, but he planted a soft kiss upon Sirius' lips and smiled at him, Remus' dorky little smile always gave Sirius butterflies in his belly and he smiled back, but he had that mischievous look in his eyes once again. Sirius moved Remus into the middle of the bed and straddled on top of him, by now Sirius had already taken off his clothes, Remus looked him up and down and smiled at him, Remus was nervous as it had been awhile since the two was this close, but he trusted Sirius and when he kissed him it all went away. Remus pulled back so Sirius could pull of his boxers and unbutton his shirt, he looked down and smiled at their crotches that has seemed to be growing with every touch, Sirius crashed his lips into his and their tongues met once again, they explored each other's moths and tingling feelings shot through him, he could feel Sirius getting more and more excited as his tip was now poking him wherever he pressed "I want you" Remus whispered, Sirius smiled and kissed down to Remus' nipple where he sucked on one and fondled with the other, he always checked on Remus by going with his body, he never wants to push him too far and make him feel uncomfortable. Remus moans and fidgets as Sirius starts kissing lower, hut he stops and sits back up grabbing a hold of his penis and slowly moving it with his hand, the more it went on the more Remus moaned, but then where his hand once was his mouth replaced it, first giving tiny kisses and then slowly sucking it, but when Remus thought it was all over Sirius lifted his legs up and slowly entered Remus "Do you want me to stop" Sirius asked "no" Sirius continued and thrusted in out of him and with every moan Remus seemed to make Sirius seem to go faster and harder into him, Remus grabbed hold of Sirius' hand as he came and Sirius rolled off beside him "I love you Sirius" "I love you too moony" and once again they were fast asleep in one another's arms once again.

School was about to finish and that would be the end of it for all of them, Remus and Sirius was still inseparable and so was lily and James. Sirius thought about the future a lot and was hoping that he could get a small place with Sirius just like lily and James where doing, but he didn't want to ask yet, he wanted to wait until the time was right. Sirius spent a lot of time with Remus since they never had to go back to school, they would sit for hours talking about all the mischief they got up to during their time at school and they used to laugh remembering the things they did. Remus was still burying his head in his books, but when Sirius got out his guitar and began to sing, Remus would melt and curl around him and listen to his soft voice. Sirius was never at home now, he barely even went back and even when he did he was always straight back, "You know you two may as well just get a place of your own and live together instead of it being like this" James jokingly said "You know Sirius that wouldn't be a bad Idea, what do you say" asked Remus, Sirius jumped on him excitedly "yes! I would love to moony! I was going to ask you when the time felt right, but now I don't even have too" Sirius said excitingly And that was that.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Everything was going well for the four of them and Sirius couldn't be any happier, he had a little place of his own with Remus not too far away from lily and James which was even better as now Sirius was a godfather to lily and James' little boy harry, he felt like he had his own family now and he felt like he actually belonged, him and Remus would have harry to stay over and they would tell him stories and play with him just as if he was their own, but he didn't know that soon his whole world was going to be ripped apart.

Remus as had a bad week, there was two full moons within the space of two days, Sirius' heart broke to see the state Remus was in. Sirius ran a hot bath and helped Remus in, he softly bathed his wounds just like Remus did to him on that night of their squabble, Remus cried from the pain. He was hurting, but he tried to hide his pain though Sirius knew how much it affected him. Sirius wrapped Remus up in a large blanket after he dried him off, he made a makeshift seating area that would be comfortable for the both of them in front of the fire. Sirius held Remus in his arms, cradling him from side to side which somehow soothed Remus. "Im always here for you moony" sirus said while he kissed him softly on the top of his head. Remus hid his face into the side of Sirius' body sobbing "hey, don't cry" Sirius said while lifting Remus back up, he wiped the tears away from his eyes and stroked down the side of his face with his thumb, "it's going to be all alright moony" Sirius reassured Remus. Sirius could see Remus was getting sleepy do he carried him off to bed even though he was rather heavy, he wrapped him up and the laid in beside him, Remus turned to face Sirius and wrapped his arm around his waist and tangled his legs between Sirius' legs, he laid his head on Sirius' chest and Sirius kissed the top of his head "I love you" Remus croaked sleepily, "I love you too" replied Sirius. Sirius was never sure on what to do when Remus was in a bad way when they was younger, but now it all came so natural to him, he always seemed to be able to calm him in down unlike other people, he knew he must have been doing something right, he wanted Remus to be better, but that was never possible.

It hadn't been that long ago that James, lily and little harry had to go into hiding because of Voldemort was out to kill them, it was a scary time for the four of them.

Remus and Sirius went round to see lily, James a little harry to spend time together. "Pafoo!" shouted a little voice harry came toddling through gripping onto Sirius' legs, Sirius lifted him in the air and made plane noises, harry laughed in enjoyment. "Hey harry! Look what I've got" Remus called standing watching Sirius and harry play, "Uncle Mooey" harry squealed in excitement to see the big bear Remus was holding that had a miniature version of a Gryffindor scarf wrapped around its neck. They all smiled in delight of how happy they were, everything was perfect, they all had one another and little harry brought bundles of laughter, he was loved by all.

Sirius found a little note as he was moving around about their little house, it was in Remus' handwriting and it said;

 _'_ **Dear Sirius, Im not sure if you'll ever read this because I know you're not the one for reading, but I just want to say, for a small keepsake on your behalf that even though the one our relation started wasn't the best, but Im kind of glad it happened anyway… I don't think I could ever love anyone as much as I've loved you and I don't think anyone could love me the way you have over the years. I love everything about you, I hope we are never apart. I love you padfoot. Remus. X**

Sirius stood reading the little note, when Remus came through and hugged him from behind "ahh I see you've found the little note I wrote for you… I never thought you'd read it" Remus said surprised "Yeah, I guess Im not that much of a reader, but I could see it was your handwriting so I had to see what it said and its beautiful, moony" Sirius replied as he turned around and snuggled into Remus' neck "Im so happy moony" Sirius said planting little kisses down Remus' neck "Sirius" Remus groaned from the excitement from the little kisses Sirius was giving him. Sirius pulled down on Remus' tie pulling in him to kiss him, Remus stepped forward pushing Sirius into the wall pinning his hands above his head, he leaned his head down and began to suck on Sirius' neck, he lowered his hand and could feel Sirius getting more and more excited. Remus unbuckled both of their belts and let their pants slide off, Sirius tugged at his shirt until it came off, things between the two quickly became heated, Remus took Sirius by the hand and took him to their bedroom he pushed him down on the bed and started kissing from his thing upwards, he climbed on top of him and started kissing him slowly while grinding on him, Sirius let out sweet little moans into Remus' mouth as he continued to tease him "stop teasing me" Sirius said while winking and biting his lip at Remus "You going to make me" Remus chuckled and with that Sirius pulled Remus underneath him and pinned him down "Yes" Sirius smirked, he lifts up his legs and they made love, every time they still feel a stronger connection with one another. Their love for each other will never die.

It was a scary time for most of the wizards and witches as a dark wizard was in power called Voldemort and he was taking innocent lives, but then the worst news came, his two best friends James and lily had been killed and baby harry had been taken off to the dursleys to live, but just as he felt it couldn't be any worse for how he was feeling he was then framed and sent to Azkaban prison for telling Voldemort for telling him where James and lily where and for killing one of his school friends peter. He was sentenced to probably lay and rot in Azkaban, but no one would believe him, he had lost everything his best friends, his godson, his freedom and his lover, he knows he will never see them again only if he's lucky enough to escape.

Remus is dealing with the loss of losing his lover, his best friends and the little boy that used to call him uncle moony, he doubts he will ever get a chance to see any of them, his mind tortures him about not being able to see his nephew grow up or if he will ever see him again. Remus is left all alone… the friends that used to help him overcome his troubles where now gone and he will have to learn to cope without them being there. Remus knew he would never do anything to ever hurt his friends or put their child in danger, he doesn't understand why it's happened. "I'll miss you padfoot" whimpered Remus as he closed his eyes crying while tucked up in bed, hoping it wouldn't be long before he would see Sirius again. His heart sank on the day of Sirius' birthday, he had so much planned for him and all of his close friends where going to be there, but two of them where dead, one of them who was believed to be dead and little harry who had been taken far away.

Remus isolated himself from the world and never made any contact with anyone, he spent most of his days indoors lying in bed. He didn't read much anymore even though reading took his mind off everything, but now it only reminded of him and how he used to put his head in front of him trying to kiss him or how he always used to distract him because he wanted attention. Everything reminded of him and his friends who were no longer here, he also thought about the little boy who had his parents and everyone who loved him taken away from him and sent to people who would never love him the way his parents, him and Sirius did. He was miserable and in pain, he didn't want to live in a world where he had no one.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: 12 years later Remus sees the paper that Sirius black has escaped from Azkaban prison plastered all over it, he looks at the picture that's below the tittle, he doesn't really recognize the man in the picture, it wasn't the man that Remus loved, he looked thin and crazy, but his eyes looked sad and tired, a tear rolled down his cheek at the sight of him, the first time he sees him after 12 long years and its like that on front of the paper. He wonders if Sirius will still remember him or if he will still remember all the times they shared together. Sirius had been running for miles in his animagus form, this way not only was he faster, but he was also less likely to be spotted as his human self. He was hungry and weak, but he was only bothered about finding Remus, even after all those years he still wanted Remus, he only hoped that Remus still wanted him too. It was late at night, but Remus was usually still awake with his head in a book lost in thought about a world that did not exist. Padfoot had reached the gate of the place he once knew, but it didn't look the same, he hoped that Remus was still here, he crept into the house trying to be as quiet as he could, but he knocks something off the side and hears someone on the floor above get up, but no one spoke, padfoot continues quietly upstairs and nudges the door open with his nose, the rooms dark, but he knows someone is in, "lumos" Remus says making his wand light up the room, Padfoot's tail was wagging, he could tell that voice from a mile away, padfoot come bounding through the room and jumps onto the bed greeting Remus with lots of wet doggy kisses "padfoot?" Remus says with a concerning tone, Sirius now turn back to human form looking rough "Remus… you remember me" "How could I ever forget you, you was the love of my life and It broke my heart when they too you away, I thought you wouldn't remember me after all of this time", "I never stopped thinking about you or James, lily and probably not so little harry now… I've never spoke to Voldemort in my life and even if I did I would of never told him where they were, I would rather die than tell him", "Sirius, I believe you, I always have believed you". Sirius cleans himself up and makes him look somewhat better than he did, he walks back into the room where Remus is still sat, Remus smiles as Sirius sits beside him and kisses his forehead "It's been a long time since you've done that" Remus said with flushed cheeks and with a bigger smile on his face, Sirius cups Remus' face in his hands and stares at all of his features, he was still the same except a little older and his eyes had saddened, he used to be able to tell what was wrong, but he couldn't any more, he lowered himself and softly kissed him on the lips and Remus kissed him softly back, the two men tumbled with one another just like they once did at school, they stopped in the middle of the bed, they ripped the last of one another's clothes off and looked at one another, Remus sat up to examine Sirius' body, his body was thin and he could see the outline of every bone, he traced his fingers over his body, but Sirius tipped him over onto his back trailing kisses from his neck to just below the bottom of his back, he once knew the body he touched, from every scar, but now there was more especially the newest looking one that was located midway down his back and locked to be about 8 inches' long, he rolled Remus back over and started teasing all the parts he once used to "don't you think were a bit old for teasing" Remus said "never too old for anything moony" and he giggled just like he once used to when they were young as they carried on, Sirius got him straddled on top of Remus "I see you're still able to do that" Remus smirked "well of course I can and still a lot more "Sirius replied winking at Remus, Sirius leaned in towards Remus and started kissing him, Remus ran his hand down Sirius' side and squeezed whatever he could, the both moaned with each other's touch, they both hadn't felt this in such a long time. Remus never took charge of anything especially in the bedroom, but Remus got up and pushed Sirius back down, he climbed on top of him and straddled Sirius between his legs and pinned his arms above him, Sirius looked so shocked and never expected this from Remus, he lent down and kissed him softly, he trailed off and kissed down Sirius' belly, but when he got to the top he took in a deep breath even he was surprised he was the one in charge, rems picked Sirius' legs and put them to the side of him as he entered Sirius, Sirius' eyes widened as he had never expected this, not ever "wow" Sirius gasped "shall I stop" Remus asked" "no, no… I'm just very shocked that's all" "ahah okay" Remus replied with a smile on his face. The carried on until they were both too tired to carry on and then they laid wrapped in on another with a sheet covering them, "Please don't ever leave me again" Remus said with a break in his voice, "I won't leave you, I promise" Sirius said comforting Remus "I love you Sirius" "I love you too Remus". They fell asleep once again in one another's arms peacefully sleeping.

A few more years had passed, Sirius finally met harry during this time. "You look so much like your farther" Sirius said holding Harry's head in his hands, "but you have your mother's eyes". Things still wasn't any better in the wizarding community, yet once again Voldemort was back to finish what he started. Death eaters where everywhere. Harry and his friends where somewhere in the department of mysteries that was located in the ministry of magic. Remus and Sirius was there fighting off the death eaters, but then out of know where Bellatrix fired the killing curse at Sirius. Everything stood still as Sirius went through veil. Remus grabbed harry, you could see the heart break in Remus' face, this time he had gone and there was no possible way of ever seeing him again. Remus was the last one, apart from peter Pettigrew, but they wasn't friends after they found out he was the one who told Voldemort when James and lily where. "I would of gone through the veil with you that day if harry didn't need me" Remus sobbed holding a picture of Sirius. "Maybe one day I'll see you in the afterlife… until then, goodbye"

Thank you to anyone who reads it, this was my first fanfiction that I've ever wrote.


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